Important 50 Before a Marriage
- Dev Rai
- Apr 5
- 3 min read
Marriage is one of the most important journeys in life.Yet, many of the skills it requires aren’t automatically built into us—they need to be learned, just like any other life skill. Take driving a car, for example. You don’t learn it just by watching others; you need hands-on practice, often guided by a trainer or a family member. The same goes for marriage—you need to consciously prepare for it.
Below is a list of skills that every boy should consider learning before becoming a husband. These skills aren’t optional—they’re essential. You can learn them from family, through online articles, or even from professionals.And while the list covers 50 key points, remember: this is just a starting point. True growth comes from ongoing learning and self-awareness.
A. Self-Preparation (Internal Readiness)
Understand your values – What matters most to you?
Know your expectations – From a partner and marriage.
Emotional regulation – Learn to manage anger, jealousy, and disappointment.
Financial planning – Budgeting, saving, and responsible spending.
Time management – Balance between work, social life, and future family time.
Basic cooking – Know how to cook at least a few meals.
Household management – Cleaning, organizing, paying bills, etc.
Good hygiene and grooming – Daily care, dressing appropriately.
Communication skills – Listening, expressing without blaming or shouting.
Conflict resolution – Learn to resolve fights without ego.
Understanding emotions – Yours and others'.
Patience – A big strength in relationships.
Empathy – Practice seeing things from your partner's perspective.
Reading on relationships – Books or videos about marriage, love languages, etc.
Health check-up and fitness – Be physically well and active.
Sex education and consent – Respect, communication, and mutual pleasure.
Spiritual clarity – Know your beliefs and how much they matter in a partner.
Learn to apologize genuinely – No ego in admitting mistakes.
Observe your family patterns – And decide what to repeat or change.
Develop hobbies – So you stay interesting and mentally healthy.
B. Partner Selection (Observations and Decisions)
Notice how she talks about others – Kindness, gossip, empathy?
Check her relationship with her family – Balance and boundaries?
Observe her communication style – Direct, emotional, passive?
How does she handle disagreements? – Silent treatment or open talk?
Her attitude toward money – Saver, spender, thoughtful?
Career goals – Do they match your expectations or future plan?
Willingness to adjust – Not sacrificing, but mature give-and-take.
Lifestyle and routines – Similar or complementary to yours?
Observe how she treats helpers/waiters/strangers – A peek into values.
Is she emotionally aware and secure? – Or highly reactive/insecure?
Humor compatibility – Do you laugh together?
Observe her in stress – How does she cope or seek support?
Check if you both respect each other’s friends and family.
Her views on parenting and children – Similar or very different?
Does she value your goals and ambitions? – Or try to change them?
C. Relationship Building (Before and After Marriage)
Talk about future plans clearly – Career, family setup, city, finances.
Establish a culture of honest feedback – Safe to say “this hurt me”.
Don’t assume – clarify – Expectations, routines, priorities.
Be consistent with your words and actions.
Create rituals of connection – Walks, dinners, praying together, etc.
Learn the art of giving space – No need to fix everything immediately.
Protect the relationship from outside negativity.
Celebrate small things together – Monthly dates, appreciation notes.
Share chores – Don’t fall into gender roles if you both can manage.
Keep checking in emotionally – “How are you feeling about us lately?”
D. Post-Marriage Practical Skills
Dealing with in-laws smartly – Respect, boundaries, filter info.
Helping during her periods, illness, or stress – Be a support system.
Sexual understanding – Ongoing consent, comfort, and satisfaction.
Teamwork in tough times – Loans, health issues, family drama.
Keep learning and growing together – You’re never “fully ready.”
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